Kid Cudi no longer feels the love, feels confused after watching the short film preceding “The Incredibles 2”

By Kai Hellberg


Swallow Media’s interview crew flanked Scott Mescudi, aka Kid Cudi, when he was spotted leaving his local AMC movie theater with a puzzled look on his face.

“Man, what the fuck just happened?” he said in complete disbelief. “My head hurts and I don’t like this. Can one of y’all call a therapist?”

A look into the movie theater later, the interview crew knew exactly what happened: Cudi had just witnessed “Bao,” the Pixar short they play before “The Incredibles 2.”

For those who haven’t seen it, “Bao” is the story of a Chinese mother who is known for making homemade dumplings. She finishes a batch for herself and her husband, who later leaves the house for the day. But as she starts to bite into one, it lets out a loud cry that shocks her. Realizing this dumpling, for whatever fucking reason, is a sentient being, she attempts to nurture it as her child.

She takes it on walks and feeds it sweet buns and shit like that. As it grows older, the dumpling adopts habitual traits of adolescence, much to the surprise of the mother. Notable moments include when the dumpling becomes detached from its mother and later gets a fucking white blonde-ass girlfriend (emphasis on the fact that the dumpling found a white girlfriend in China and also, it’s a fucking dumpling. Like barely 6 inches tall, and that’s pretty damn generous).

I mean, I guess there’s some point about Empty Nest Syndrome here, so go ahead and write your shitty thinkpieces, VICE.

But the confusing part happens when she stops it from leaving her home to go live with his girlfriend. But before it can leave, the mom eats the dumpling in one bite in some weird kind of vitriolic impulse.

“Like damn, is that cannibalism, is that murder, is that animal abuse?” Cudi asked. “Cuz it’s her child but it’s not a child but I’m really fucking confused. I wanna figure this out but I wanna stop thinking about it.”

Following her actions, she cries on her bed, but is then comforted by a human resembling her dumpling son. This is likely tying it all together and going with the old-ass “bad dream” trope from movies. But then she suddenly accepts the fact that her son is older, or something like that, and the whole family –including aforementioned blonde-ass girlfriend– eats dumpling around the table.

When asked what he thought of the ending, Cudi said he didn’t care.

“Yo even with the ending, the audience is still posed with the conundrum of whether or not this woman had sadistic thoughts of murdering her fuckin’ son, man. Shit’s fucked up. Like I’m not even depressed or anything anymore, but my mind is exhausted so I just have to pretend this never happened. Damn, I was really excited to see the Incredibles tho.”


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